So to start off, I have tour in a FEW DAYS. I am SO stressed and pinched for a time I can literally taste my own BLOOD boiling in my throat. Yes, I'm anxious. I'm excited. But I'm really stressed out! We have planned a tour that should've been planned in 3 months, in 3 weeks. There is NO WAY that my dancers can pull that, especially Mandy being with HER band. UGH!
Well tonight, one of my friends called me bawling their eyes out. NEEDED me to be there for them. This is someone I've been SO close to for about 2 years. We're super close, but we've had our rough edges. This is one of my only friends I could literally FIGHT him and speak my mind COMPLETELY without worrying about how he'll "take" anything.
As you can ( hopefully) tell, he's of the "gay" persuasion. We were literally standing in the middle of a store earlier and he had to undo the tie of my jogging pants by getting on his knees and doing it with his teeth. Yeah. That's how much we TRULY trust eachother. He's been someone I've gone to for nearly EVERYTHING! Such a WONDERFUL true hearted person.
He's had his share of "drabble" in drugs, he's had some things in his life I could NEVER do! Thankfully he is VERY clean now. I am SO proud of the obstacles he has come over. I think that is the reason we're so close. I met him at his "rock bottom". And we accepted eachother for who we were, and we've come through so much TOGETHER. Temptation is for EVERYONE. He's talked me out of SO MUCH stupid stuff. I am SO thankful for this boy.
Anywho. Tonight he came over cause he needed me and we had SUCH a wonderful night. I haven't felt so close to him in a long time. He taught me ( more of "reminded me") how to play speed, he rubbed my stomach since I've been having THE. WORST. CRAMPS. OF. ALL. HISTORY. We totally bonded SO much.
Well the REASON he "needed" me was to NOT do something. ( no it's not "drugs" or anything BAD). Well once he came over, he made plans to go hang out with the person he was coming to my house to AVOID seeing. I, OF COURSE, tried to talk him out of it but the bottom line is that I don't CONTROL him! Eventually we'd worked out what was going to happen.
He was going to go with this person, come back to my house in ONE HOUR. He just left about... 30 minutes ago. I'm sure it'll be closer to two hours. Anyway, I hadn't realized HOW MUCH I messed up after he left! I have to be OUT of the house BY 5:30. Tomorrow is a HUUUUGE day!!
Well he'll be back at about 3:30 a.m. probably which normally would NOT be a problem but tomorrow is HUGE!
So I had to tell my Mom he was leaving and WOW. My Mom is NOT one to get "super mad"... at all. I've NEVER seen her SO mad at me. She sat me down and lectured, and lectured, and yelled, and yelled. I honestly think I'm gonna be grounded. Grounded to my TOUR BUS??? Better than being grounded at HOME. But until tour... I'm pretty sure I'm stuck at home! My Mom isnt' REALLY strict but she's the strictER parent! She knows if I'm wrong, I NEED to learn WHY. SO she sent me to my room ( yes I'm 16 and get sent to my room to "think about what I did"), then she's gonna tell me my "punishment" when he gets back in an hour. Or two hours. Whatevs.
OK, so I'm SO stressed. He is literally MY social life right now! My social associatino until tour is in HIS HANDS! I think she'll be over it by that time but WHO KNOWS!
My Mom, I can COMPLETELY understand.
1. She's worried about him.
2. She is worried I WON'T be up tomorrow.
3. She'll be awake until HE gets back, putting HER in a horrible position to be up at 4 a.m.
4. I have to be awake probably about... 15, 30 minutes AFTER he gets BACK. So I have THAT much sleep time, and tonight of ALL nights I NEEDED sleep!!!
So I ( tried) lied to my Mom. ( went and told her the truth shortly after. Put me in a WORSE situation.)
I set him up to COMPLETELY break my Mama's rules.
I let him doing it, knowing COMPLETELY how much STRESS and TIME it would put me under.
I guess it's just my teenage yaers thinkign "Live while you can" but there are also responsibility's and those were the LAST thing on my mind when I helped him to completely figure this thing out.
So I KNOW I am in DEEP trouble!!! And I'm praying he arrives and returns SAFETLY. I am PRAYING I can go on minimul, to NO sleep tomorrow. And I am prayign that this stress TRULY dies down some within me, because I cannot handle it much longer. I'm at the brink of stress, ha.
I am SO tired, PRAYING my Mom doesn't come in and see me on my macbook. That'd honsetly put me in hell, right now. I need to lay down and at least be able to FAKE asleep if she walks in... but what is there to do? I CAN'T fall asleep until he is home safetly. UGH!!
Well there's my VENT!!
I NEED A MASSAGE, SUSHI, STARBUCKS, AND A CUDDLE BUDDY. STAT!!! =]
Love always, MC <3
P.S. Dear cramps, it's Miley... you know, the girl your making her life MISERABLE right now. And honestly NOT adding to the "PERFECT" day... Go away. Your not welcome here. And I hate you. Love, Miley.
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About Me
- Miley
- I am experiencing new things, I am learning new lessons, I am living my life.
Omg I totally have painful cramps too
ReplyDeleteI know exactly how u feel
don't u just hate it when u cramps and u have to do smthing important?
I do
anyways I know how it's like to have a gay friend
I have one he's also my friends friend we don't really chat since my parents think he's straight or maybe faking he's gy
they're super strict!
My dad is actually the stricter one
he won't let me have any fun until I finish all the things in my agenda
hope ur cramps go away
I'll pray for them to go :))
ttyl
luv ur blog
totally relates to me since I'm also a teen!
Xoxo
shannen
Wow Miley stress is gonna over come your body! Gurl u need to just relax an dput stuff behind and sorry about ur cramps! I had them so bad last month i was literally bent over double with a heating pad so try that a heating pad on ur tummy it helps. You should just let ur friend do his own thing cause with his situations its putting more stress on you and stress isnt really all that good for you. Maybe your mama will cut you some slack if you explain everything. It must suckk to get grounded too. Glad im past the grounded stages. But yea just calm down and you so need to quit stressing so much your gonna put yourself in a tizzy! LOL! Goodnite miley and hope you sleep good.
ReplyDeleteIf ya wanna chat just hit me up on msn othfan3@nc.rr.com Im ALL EARS!!!
Luv ya miley
Luv Crystal
ps im the one who sent you the quotes over twitter,
please follow if you can CrystalLynn87!
bahaha GURRRLLLL u already know my thoughts ! and CRAMPS = I DONT WANNA BE A GIRL THIS WEEK ! <33
ReplyDeleteohh. stress and cramps. can there be anything worse? huh?, YES would be the correct answer actually.but in this content i would rather say NO!
ReplyDeletei honeslty have NEVER EVER had cramps. thank god. but my sis always has them. but my besty always has. so she cant come to the school for abt 3 days.
i just hope the "cramps" heard ur nice PS talk and they will leave u alone :D
uh, wt u said abt our gay friend and the whole situation u have there last night. it sounds harsh.it sucks u werent able to sleep. i donno wt was up to ur friend but i hope he arrived to your home safely.and that ur mom didnt ground u. u say being grounded in a tour bus is better than at home?! why so???
well its deffo better than a closet of course ;)xD
u better let me know later how you are.dont wanna worry. hope u got some sleep and that ur friend is ok ;)
take care<333
I just started reading your blogs... i totally understand how making them and speaking your mind trough writing is a really good practice for you to vend and relax and try to find some peace in the midst of all..i'd never realize about this until i got to a point where i needed to do it myself to remain together and peaceful... its just so good to be honest and just be yourself!! and i even kind of discovered that im not that bad at it..haha
ReplyDeleteYou know what Miles...it really amazes me to see what a great person you are...i must say you're really down to earth for your age =]...your a very genuine and open person..i can almost feel like i know you (that's good)cause it feels like a have a new best friend and i really need that at this point of my life =]..
About every thing that's been happening to you lately.. dont worry... EVERY THING SHALL PASS!! just cast ALL of your cares on God (your cramps and everything).. He takes care of you ; ) and He will be with you the hole way through!!
I really wish for you the best and pray for you to find the peace and strenght that you need to do everything you have to do!
true...i have reallllly serious cramps so i know EXACTLY how you feel =[...i've gotta say that im EXTREMELY happy ur writing these blogs cuz it goes to show that you're just the everyone else, you're not different or God didnt give you a period just like EVERYONE else..you're the exact same,maybe just A LITTTTTLE PRETTIER haha than some of us....and the fact that ur soo genuine and down to earth enough to wanna be yourself is admirable..i feel like i know you much much better already =]..so thanks for giving us the opportunity =]..You rock =]..and good luck on Wonder World...You'll WOW everybody and be amzing as ALWAYS
ReplyDeletexoxoxo
Lana
Wow. dude you really don't catch a brake huh?
ReplyDeletetake a serious breather. Your friend is fine im sure and He's also his own grown self & while yes you helped him make his plans, sweetie he was gonna do what he wanted with or without you EVENTUALLY. Maybe not tonight but he would of done it another night, so dont feel like you've done something oh so terrible. You were just trying to be a good friend which is what any of us would do. Sometimes we have to think about ourselves first tho. I've been in your situation SO many times before & it landed me in the hospital just as many times because of stress & anxiety. The way you are going with your stress levels, that could be you VERY soon & no one wants to see you like that :-\ which I think is why your mom flipped. shes just as stressed as you are & she's trying to look out for you because she knows just how much you have to put out in these next few days with tour. Anywayz Hopefully things worked out ok & you got enough rest that you can function. I'll keep you in heart prayer & mind all day :)
P.s. One bottle of Midol, One Sushi platter(Spicy Tuna! woohoo) & One Starbucks Iced Caramel Machiatto with extra drizzle & whip coming right up (my favorite drink LoL I make it at work ALL the time). I Can't help you with the massage since I'm no expert LoL but I hope you at least cracked a smile :)
Xoxo
ČhrisŁ¡ňâ
this is the perfect time to say your saying ouchy boo boo or whatever it is you say lol i hope your friend is safe and keep praying its the only thing you can do i guess and i know the feeling of been sent to your room while your 16 i still do and im 17 but thats mothers for you
ReplyDeletewell PROTECTIVE lol
anyway i hope your both ok
john. C
wow. your mum seems like a very lively person the pictures ive seen. but yeah. mothers will be just like what a mother should be. lecture us until we know the right thing.
ReplyDelete